Life is in transition. What was once a living ideal, a fading moment of temporary life perfection, a comfort in an unknown and glorious position of self, has seamlessly woven itself into a state of chaotic readjustment. Thirty days ago I was in Boulder, Colorado beaming with a love I had never felt so righteously in my life. My days were spent by flowing creeks five minutes from my house, watching the pollen of neighboring trees float through the air like drunk little angels, like summer snow raining down in a slow waltz. My nights were cool and crisp wind dancing through my beard like sensual fingers. Never had I felt such a joyous embrace of the Mother Spirit that the Native Americans speak about with such reverent love. Never had I been so at peace within my own body–with my own purpose. I felt empowered. Alive. Vivacious and daring. I wanted to scale 14,000 foot mountains, ski down the steepest slopes, jump out of airplanes. With every mile I hiked up in those gorgeous Rocky Mountains I became more infused with that ancient fire of courage-in-spite-of-death. I felt the tingle of old spirits whose lives had been lost in the search for new and grand experiences and I understood how those who came to be out amongst that wicked beauty of mountain poppies and great birds could easily become lost to the old formalities that bind one to daily life.
My mistake was not being more vigilant of that fire’s overflow into my already unstable life in the “real world.” I began to view the world as a hike. As a challenge which could not defeat me. The folly in this sentiment was that I allowed the wind-tunnel of hubris that I had built around me, to funnel my vision away from the big picture. I believed I could accomplish anything without any plan as to how to actually accomplish it. Call it naivety, call it stupidity or blind action. Truth is I became blind to any possibilities other than what I desired to happen and in doing so set myself up for an unexpected and exhausting readjustment of my state of being. Let me express greatly here that I have no regrets as to what happened nor to how things ended up; however, such was not the case during and shortly after the events. In the turmoil of mind and body against spirit that occurs when one in starving, lost, broken and alone, one finds it much harder to see the whole picture or appreciate the simple beauties of synchronicity and divine providence. With that said, I believe whole-heartily that all things we experience are beautiful and perfect and it is only our current perception within moments of unexpectedness that we experience other-wise.
I say this as I sit 2000 miles from where I thought I would be. Where, at one point not long ago, I had wished to never return. I have had to restart completely. Both in my social/financial situation and my spiritual/psychological position of understanding within myself. It was not easy for me at first and there were certainly times when I questioned the validity of my own purpose and understanding of the world. But as days pass by like breaths beneath my brow, I find more and more strength and confidence to move forward into that dark unknown we call the future. My vivacity and Love for the world and for its people has begun to grow back rapidly.
As the old cliché goes: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
So I am not dead, as far as I can tell, and because of this fact I must trek onward down the rocky trail of life. Over the unexpected cliffs of emotion and down the switch-backs of daily experience. With the knowledge that all trips and injuries are merely temporal obstacles of which I am to learn to overcome. Each step is strength beneath my heel. Each sharp intake of breath is the recycling of old life through the new. Of familiar experience into novelty. The trepidation of an injured soul has faded and through the conquest of my own fear I persevere.
I begin with this story because in my own trails of life I have come to see that the whole world is in Transition. We are all struggling to adapt ourselves to an old world modality that is fading into the worn pages history. We are no longer content within our hearts to abide by the unquestioned banalities of dry Western ideals. The market in which we were trained to abide has failed to provide the most basic provisions of human happiness. All across the world people are feeling the strain of modern ideals against the reality of our positions. No longer do we trust the guidance of our elders-for their ideals and their preparations of us for the future have left us devoid of any skills of which to produce positive change inside their box. The lines were drawn in order NOT to be broken. It is my hope that the generation below my peers, those raised within the limitless boundaries of Internet Knowledge, will learn from the follies our parents’ generation that the capitalistic and self-centered goals of the post-industrial age were necessary for a time, and are now wholly out-dated. It is also my hope that they may learn from our generation, who has struggled our whole lives against an authority who wishes to see us silenced and dumb. We have established the base of a new paradigm through the internet and through our brash disregard for a status quo of which we cannot relate.
With such sites as Reddit, which has, through a most basic format of internet community organizing, helped raise money for numerous cancer patients and charitable organizations, found the culprits to murder before the police, brazenly spoken up against the blatant abuse of police authority, and helped many, many people resolve personal conflicts when there was no immediate and physically present community of local family and peers. Sites such as Reddit give me hope for the future of our society–a hope which can longer be found in the blathering rhetoric of politicians and mass media.
We have all been placed upon this trail of life in which we must continuously climb upward. And though our hands may bleed at times and our legs may tremble under the thought of an onward march, we must continue to trek forth with the hope and passion that things CAN change. That the world CAN be a better place.
We are all in transition. We are all afraid somewhere, deep down, that we’ve taken a wrong step;
followed a wrong path; turned at the wrong sign-post. But we must remain confident that each step we make, on whatever path we choose, is a step of progress. Each falter, each trip and bungle and crash is progress. Each tear, each scar, each broken heart is progress. Every breath is an opportunity to learn, to grow, to change. What ideals do you wish to see for the future? What paths do you wish to see unfold? What mountains do you wish to conquer?
We are in transition. Now is the time to choose the roads we wish to travel. To lead the lives we wish. Even if those lives go completely against the ideals of our current society. Life is too short to play by rules which do not work. Life is too precious to let it whither up and die in the swollen bellies of hungry souls.
March onward, my friends. Stay vigilant and take every step knowing that you are beautiful, precious and necessary.
Stay strong my fellow humans. Stay of Love.
Let’s allow the world to change.